ARGH!!!! i lost the last skin! dumb ass blogger. i knew i should have saved the template text commands. bah i can't be bothered to go look up another skin and fix the whole thing up. think i'll just stick to this one. it looks nice anyway.

was supposed to go for mambo for the 4th consecutive time. beat that. somehow some 2nd sgt forced us to book in and gave extras to someone who booked in 20 mins late. what's with exercising his authority with the oc, 2ic and csm of the company away. some people are just weird. anyway no lost for me. only thing was that i booked in like 4 hour early, waited for cheeyu 2 hours in camp for the ps2 cables and cords. spent the time figuring out the bassline for the intro to lost in emotion and the entire song for pug jelly's come home soon. read up a bit more on past mortem.

had a roll call at 12 midnight. then we went to do area cleaning. found out later some ministry concerned with health and living conditions was coming down the next day. even then why couldn't we book in earlier and finish the area cleaning and then go for mambo. apparently someone's over his head with jealousy, insisting that nobody is to book in at 3am. what the fuck.

my company should just fall apart and all it's commander along with it. ok the fucked up commanders.

featuring csm1, finally something other than just 1-5. old but still hunky, tsk tsk indeed a special breed of men.
 

post-exercise. goodbye heng chun...but hello to the long anticipated R&R! 

us before moving out. me looking goofy again. 

detachment 1-5. top row: champ, a formal looking 2lt tee, bangshi, old man, li koon, bobo, malcolm, cheah and me! the 3 stooges below are ah goh, wang and cheeyu. 

can you spot me? hope not, i look quite goofy here hah.  

last mambo was not so fun, i think the more mambos i go consecutively the less fun it becomes. although most of the company guys went, everybody split until dunno go where ended up dancing all over the place. learnt a few more moves for mambo, now i feel that mambo is like sign language lesson hah.

friday was wasted, could have went down to zouk but my brains weren't really working. ended up playing dota with mao, xu, cheeyu and 2lt nap, who just broke up with his girlfriend. poor chap is being posted to brunei sian. dota was quite fun, more or less grasped the playing style. has been almost a year sinced i played lan i think, quite some change to the games and everything, but i wasn't very lost thank goodness.

saturday as usual was taken away stood for an hour trying to hold digested fibre with my rectal muscles. not to mention shouting as we parade through the public, and still trying to hold my shit together( yes pun intended). another show for another crowd of nonchalant kids.

went to jam with the usual crew plus ashik. ashik is quite good i think, quite a waste of good studio time. really don't know what songs to play, not that i didn't want to but i always come to a mind blank when jamming songs. wanted to meet up with the rest to watch baybeats, in the end i lost the fight against fatigue. if it wasn't for dinner time, i might have slept over to next morning. well now i can't sleep.

the prime suspect of the theft case in my company has confesssed. according to champ. speaking of whom i just dugged up his blog and gallery and found some taiwan ATEC photos. such fond memories, and i didn't realised then, it's always like this isn't it. nowadays the adrenalin isn't pumping anymore, the commando camaraderie, the pride to wear the red beret(made worse when i saw the junior intake). now i'm just another fat arse on the couch. some fucked up grouch. like that green day song.

i'm eating too much durian. damn heaty. argh. maybe i should drink lots of water. everytime i blog, i feel like swimming the next day. hah weird. the thought of the pool with speakers jolted in my mind, suddenly it seems like not a bad idea. then it wouldn't be that boring swimming laps.

save me. teach me how to fish.

mambo 130705 L-R:me, josh, and huiyang. didn't realise marissa was in the photo behind till i uploaded the pic hah

me lazing, prob dilemma-ed by ps2 and tv. 

really don't feel like blogging these last few days.

last week's mambo was not bad, had fun dancing, learnt lots of para para moves. stupid chua say i never informed him to go then just never go. phuture was so packed that we were only allowed entry to zouk main. saw laurene and danced with her a bit, stupid woman was super high and complaining to me that she took a puff from a cigarette. asked laurene where was her friends and bring them here and she said they were all at phuture drinking and looking after their table. sian.

went again on friday due to peer pressure. was too tired, fatigue and all. took less than half a jug to get me puking. so i left off early with han. han probably didn't club in a long time, he puked in the cab haha. before i left was like being a wallflower for 1 hour, then cheah was sliming this regular girl that i always see at phuture on friday. i also saw the girl i did not get the number from, the one whose friend gave cheah a fake number. think she is a regular also, saw her sitting at some regular table. could have done something about it. she was sitting at the table just beside the one where mooncake's friends were sitting.

NE show for the primary school kids was crap. they couldn't be bothered at all. before the parade, RSM was like asking us during dinner, some small talk between 4 coy and him. what would you do if a bomb was to go off. most of us were stumped, for me at least i gave an answer but not the ideal one. so he said, what's important to you over there(the padang)? the silence we are all too familiar with ensues. the children there are important says RSM. he continues, "if a bomb goes off, everyone will be shocked and lost. we must not lose our head. commandos must be steady, stand fast and take instructions from the commanders. cordon off areas, bring the children away, nobody will tell you where to run(i was thinking: because nobody knows where the next bomb will go off), just get away from the blast area. all we did was take extra 200 bucks more than your average NSF, and we are expected so much more. if you ever have any friends, brothers, sons going to commandos, advise them not to. it's just not worth it, we do so much more for so little. seriously underpaid, not like other wimpy units slacking around and recieving almost as much as us.

talking about bomb blasts. terrorists are damn zhai, i always wanted to be a terrorist. but guess it's not such a good idea, i am very much interested in demolition, i don't know why. england is in big shit. wondered why singapore IOC never got bombed. wondered if paris would have got bombed if they had been elected instead. since france has anti-american sentiments, and the general direction of this terrorism is going against uncle sam. well, ignorance is bliss for me. don't want to think about it too much.

recieved a call from jarrod yesterevening while i was lazing around ps2ing and watcing tv, was supposed to jam but ed forgot to book the studio in advance. jar said i can book in tonight instead. was like wow but i did not have any plans so i wasn't particularly ecstatic. looks like there's not much progress with the band, what with writing songs and all. chua is just doing his own stuff i wondered if he seriously is bothered at all. ed's got his own band coming up, so i've got nothing to say. bao's either pms-ing or doing something on his own again. i'm like the only person with nothing to do. so i guess i should just go and find somebody serious and get along on my own. or maybe i should just stay aloof for a while and maybe i will get some inspiration. i find that penning down phrases really helps to write songs.

so i woke up late this morning and just potatoed myself in front of the tv, eating durians. then there was this MTV trippin. featuring cameron diaz, some other female actress that i forgot the name, redman(some rapper) and mark hoppus! i suddenly sat up when they mentioned him. i guess blink 182's tom delonge and mark hoppus were my heros. they really influenced the songs i listened to, they way i behave last time in college. so fucking carefree, and also inspired me to get a band. i think life should be like that --- my life is as interesting as i want it to be and you are not welcomed. no i do not give a damn. what you think, what you say, what you do i don't care. girls are everywhere, you've seen one, you've seen them all except for her. i don't have the looks, charm, money, cars but i've got myself, self-sufficient. you look at me because you are green with envy. jealous that i am rich in the currency of freedom, intellect and vulgarities. i am going to hell, aren't we all? everyone's got their darkest moment, so you want to talk about karma? you don't have and don't need a reason to hang around with me. if not go smell your own armpit and bathe yourself every ten minutes. i like to bitch and moan because i'm not perfect, go somewhere else i don't need an audience. yes i've got a problem with you and i'm looking for a fight. not giving till the end, bleed me dry, hang me high like a flag. i am the epitome of youth. i'm so full of energy, i'm going to burst if you tear me apart. i dance like the whole world is not watching, your attention is not required i can retrieve it anytime. in short, I AM KING. i want you to be my queen.

really feel like swimming today, but i think it's damn weird to go swim by myself. anybody out there who fancy doing laps in the swimming pool with me please call me. think i am getting fat again.

the company is falling apart man. some fellow went to steal money, 200 bucks worth of coins. worse of all he stole it from the canteen uncle. SIB came down, but before that the case was more or less closed. wondered what happened after. but the thief sure go DB(detention barracks), i don't think there's any way to cover up this incident especially when SIB is involved.

went to swim this morning with cheeyu. saw this woman swim super fast, must be a competitive swimmer. then we thought we saw lta moses with some girl heading for the leisure pool.

thought of a theme for an album. maybe i'll write songs about the average guy's life, my life. it's hard to write about something you didn't experience and i don't really want to sleep in the slums and all so i'll write about myself muahaha.

i have been so sian recently, ignoring my emotions(not infatuation that sort), walking around with a deadpan face and listening to punk rock, listening to their style, song structure, lyrics and all. i'm so bored.

went out with chua and ed again. met up with lloyd, ed's armskote man. nonsense fella whole day want to pick up girls, but he's quite zai with billiards, learnt quite a bit from him. watched war of the worlds, quite a nonsensical movie. i would say steven spielberg did not do a good job. felt feverish half-way through the movie, rushed home took temperature, it was 38. felt okay but didn't really want to book in, so i told the officer that i woke up and i had fever and it was getting worse. truth was i could take it but why should i make myself suffer. what a boring day.

i know i have something to blog about but i think it's the post-fever stuff that's making me weak. will talk about it some other time.

MONDAY 27-06
wrote another song during another of those bahasa indonesia lectures. don't want to post lyrics anymore, think they are all too cheesy.

THURSDAY
finally cleared SOC, hah don't have to care about it anymore for the rest of my life, can kinda smell ORD from that.
watched cannibal holocaust, hell of a crap movie, lots of violence and porn. in the end not much was imparted to viewers. everyone was just like wtf. while the others watched constantine, which till today i still haven't finished watching.

FRIDAY
saf day parade. lots of bastarding happening. the usual suspects.
watched this japanese futuristic show called casshern, read the cd cover, said it was some top ten box office in japan. tried watching midway with the guys was damn super lost, then i went to read the sypnosis, begin to understand a bit. everything is so final fantasy in that show, the ending was crap. another of those try-too-hard-but-failed film. watched two crap films in two days.

SATURDAY(today)
went down to padang. saw the red lions do their thing. gurkhas were standing there with shotguns and mp5, they look kinda funny with that straw hat worn like half-tilted. police k-9 were there also, they are actually transported in air-con. some dogs really have it good. STAR team were also there, so was SOC. once again lost my voice. looks like rehearsals aren't such a bore with those girls around.
chua wants to go eat supper and then watch war of the worlds. i'm like too tired to catch a movie but i wouldn't mind supper. but just going our for supper is quite nonsensical, guess we are going to call it off. listened to three cheers for sweet revenge over and over again. it wasn't too bad i guess. not stuff that the layman ear would appreciate, but in terms of style and structure i thought it was not bad. time to sleep. blog more tommorow.